A guy in his underwear comes into my yard during the rainstorm today

* make us famous

I can’t tell what he is asking for but it seems urgent—maybe he wants to wait it out under my lawn umbrella? No, no, I think he’s saying he needs to...pee? Yes he is telling me he needs to pee and is looking around my yard in the rain for a good place to do it.

He points at potential pee targets while looking to me for approval. I stammer words such as “Go piss across the road!” and “What the fuck?”

He finally opts to pee near the table, while making far more eye contact with me than I would have had the roles been reversed.

He thanks me and stumbles back out into the rain.